So I guess this is how the beginning of a war feels like. But what interests me more is not the war itself but the way people behave when they know what they are going to lose or gain. Or when they inevitably lose their last hope. Two episodes that were filled with very contradicting elements. And many forced smiles.
So the war has started and I feel like dad Kim only now showed his true nature. Not that before he was any good or compassionate or caring but for a single moment you could think that maybe, just maybe, he truly wanted something good for his children. At least a safe future. And that, because he cared about them. But I guess that is not the case. Not that I had any real doubts but I was hoping until the very last-minute. Maybe I was too naive. Probably. What scares me the most though is that what he does in order to manipulate his sons is not something private (only) but very public. People in their circle can see the way he chose to humiliate Won. People will realise why he chose to have the whole country know that Tan is an illegitimate (even though I hate what this word represents) son of his at this time. He didn’t even consider how that would look like from the outside. Apparently it was beneficial for the company stocks (not that I understand exactly how that is possible even though I have studied Finance and Accounting in uni) but with what cost? That truly shows to me that he doesn’t care at all for them. He is destroying them and he slowly becomes successful in this.
You can tell that he is successful when you see Won. How his father actions and how his (Won’s) misplaced goals have shaped his personality and his actions. He has turned against his own brother, he has lost the woman he loves or better he was never quite able to be with her and he doesn’t even do good on his job because of course his father will never allow him to be good enough. Talk about a ruined person.
And it’s not only Won that slowly becomes affected by his father’s actions. Tan is too. And it breaks my heart to say that. Won at least wanted to gain the company. Tan never did. He didn’t have a purpose that could justify the things he is loosing. Of course I’m not implying that Won’s purpose justifies his actions but at least there is the company and that could play the role of “a purpose”. Tan really believed that he could have a family. That if he tried enough he could be able to gain his brother’s trust and his father’s understanding that the company should go to Won. I think that he even believed that he could finally say the truth about his mother and after that things could be something like normal. And he thought that if he really tried his best he could be with the girl he wanted, a girl who helped him find the courage he was missing, and live his life by his own rules.
And after what happened it was really evident that he lost his last hope. He really did. And there is nothing worse in a war than finding yourself loosing hope. Loosing your faith.
His father gave an ultimatum to Eun Sang and she believed that there was nothing else she could do. She did feel scared and I do believe that she thought she was doing the best for Tan. But she didn’t. She did the exact opposite from what she hoped for. The problem in Tan’s life wasn’t Eun Sang. She didn’t make his position any worse. His father would have done the same thing to him even if there was no Eun Sang in the horizon. She only did good to him. She helped him find courage, she treated him with compassion, she liked him for who he was and not for what his last name was, she gave him hope. And then she took it away. It feels like she betrayed him. Over and over again with every fake smile she showed him after her conversation with his father. And she left him all alone, in this big scary and empty world that he has found himself battling in. Alone, unable to breathe.
And the kiss they shared spoke volumes to me. I felt that it meant so much more than any normal kiss would mean. It was passionate but above all it was desperate. Desperate for Tan to make her realise how much he cares for her and to show her that he is trying, that he is trying with all his might. Desperate for Eun Sang to make him understand that what she does is for his own good, to feel him a bit closer before she leaves. It’s sad to see how different their thoughts were.
It does break my heart.
(pictures credit: Dramabeans)